Author CHRISTINA DITZEL

Dating yourself before ‘The Person’

CHRISTINA DITZEL Leave a comment

So many people struggling in their dating life. And do you know why? Because they don’t even know how they want to be treated and yet they put expectations on someone else to meet their criteria. I think by now I have earned a gold star for “Top Performing single women”. It has been 7 long years and sometimes, yes, I feel like I might be single forever! But let’s be honest, once you’ve mastered the skill of being “single and happy” you definitely don’t want to waste time trying to get “hitched and miserable!” Dating in the 21st century has proven to be “the most dysfunctional time to date” EVER! I have been on my fair share of dating apps which….

  1. Sent me through a loop of facetime conversations that made me feel awkward as hell
  2. Text messages that were way over the top and inappropriate
  3. Phone calls that went great ……. until they didn’t!
  4. Went on more “meetup dates” that were a total waste of time

GET CLEAR ON YOUR DATING INTENTIONS

The truth is, No one knows how to be clear on their dating intentions and as a result they place all these expectations on someone else to fulfill all their dating requirements. Dating in your late 30’s, 40s or 50s is miserable and it’s just not fun anymore. These are the years we are supposed to be alive, open minded, and know what the fuck we want! Unfortunately, I think the Trump, Biden, Covid juice has literally fried everyone’s brain cells! Basically, people have lost their marbles! I have grown up with strong, independent women who require strong courageous, independent men. Unfortunately, men today have allowed the women to take the reign and they just gave up completely!

Listen Men, just because women are rediscovering their masculine sides in the corporate world (or in all worlds), does not mean you get to eat the tranquilizer of self-doubt, depression, and weakness. This leads to your narcissistic insecurities, and we DON’T WANT IT! We want you to take the reins, but we must trust you enough to lead us into abundance. If you can’t do that, we will continue to resist. And we all know where that resistance has gotten us.

The strangest thing I have encountered in dating is this “divulging of medical records, political preferences”. These things don’t really hold any real value in a relationship. When and why do we get so involved in political matters, that we allow it to literally control all our relationships? In fact, it dons not only control our relationships, but it has also taken control of our minds, body and soul. In 2019 there was so much peace in this world! Going to store was exciting because I knew I was going to meet a new stranger who was guaranteed to enlighten me, and vice versa. Now, we are 6ft apart, wearing masks, and hiding from society so we don’t catch the VID. It is fucking redundant, and those politicians are sitting up in the White House watching each and everyone one of us scramble around like a bunch of scared monkeys! And do you know what monkeys do when they are scared? They attack!

There are two sides today. On the one side, people are walking around with this entitled attitude, and on the other side they walk around with a defensive attitude. It is so exhausting! I have witnessed kids running households because their adult parents can’t get a handle on their own life. It is ridiculous! Get your shit together! Stop worrying about who is a democrat, who is a republican, who is vaccinated and who isn’t! Like really? It’s not the plaque. I can tell you first hand, I live in Florida and we have been open through most of the pandemic and I don’t see pe3ople dropping dead on the side of the road, Accept for those that have blown their brains out from feeling lonely and depressed. Get your head screwed on properly. This is not end times! Trust me, I have had my fair share of “close to death” experiences, and if God wanted me dead, he would have done it already!  I mean I clean houses for a living! Do you know how many Covid people I met? I am not dead! Unless I am a literal “ghost writer”.

Truth is, so many people have a bad habit of losing themselves in other people. It’s ironic to me how fast our human nature adapts to new cultural belief systems. Even if it’s in total conflict with our own morality. So many of us easily allow others to influence, control, or manipulate us. If I have learned anything in my seven years of singleness, it is that I love “ME” just as I am! I love all the parts of me that is allowed to grow, learn, and change daily, without holding back and without the voices in my head telling me I can’t, won’t or shouldn’t!  I explore life! When I go to heaven and they ask me what I enjoyed most, I will have so many experiences to share. I don’t want to waste the journey! Do you? Do you really want to be laying in your death bed wishing you felt loved? Like, truly loved! Do you even know what it feels like to be “truly loved, cherished, and treasured”? I am guessing you NO! Or you would not still be reading this blog.

Don’t worry your no alone! More then half of society does not know how to love, nor do they know what it feels like to be loved. And do you know why? Because of all that shit I spoke about earlier! People allow politics, media, tv, and “other people” to determine their destiny. Most of us never get the chance to reach our full potential because we are held back by the philosophies, and ideas of the world we surround ourselves in. But what if I told you that you could create an entirely different world for yourself? What if I told you that you could have the love of your life, the job of your dreams, and the power to create a life of abundance in all areas?

No! I am not going to try to sell you an overpriced program filled with information that you can find on the internet. What I am going to do is give you actionable activities that will help you determine what kind of life you really want to live. I will help you determine where you need boundaries and how to set those boundaries, so you can begin applying new behaviors that will have you performing at your best! You will have a love for life and a desire inside your soul that will have everyone wanting to drink “YOUR JUICE”! See, I believe in transformation, not motivation. What I do not believe in  is “faking it until you make it”. I think that is all bullshit!

“Why would anyone want to fake a life they can’t actually enjoy when they can build a life that truly makes them happy?”

First, if you think for one second that you will be happy when you find “your person”, you are sorely mistaken! If you are not happy today, alone with you, why would anyone else be happy with you? Furthermore, if they are not happy with you, they will be miserable with you! Making you more miserable in the process. Do you see where I am going with this? So, before you find “your person” you must first, find you! You must know the kind of person you want in your life, and then you must become the kind of person that person would want in their life! Just as important as it is for you to be happy, it is just as important for the person you are with to be happy. And you will find this works in all areas of life. Your work life, your friends and social life, even with your family life. When you have boundaries, know what you want, discover the things you don’t want in your life, and you become clear on your expectations right out the gate. It becomes very clear who is for you and who is against you. And let’s face it, we want to lose all those individuals who want to knock us down, change us, or make us feel less then or awkward about our own beliefs.  

So if you are struggling in and out of relationships that only end with you starting over and having to rediscover yourself, my advice to you would be “discover who you want to be and become that person before you meet THAT PERSON”.

If you are in a place of confusion and want to learn how to discover yourself amidst your mess, check this out! You won’t be disappointed. I may still be single after 7 years, but it is for one, by choice, and two, I would much rather be single then settled! I don’t invest in people or things that make my life unhappy, boring, inadequate, or keep me from reaching my full potential and living my best life. And neither should you!

Where is My Holidate (Part 2)

CHRISTINA DITZEL Leave a comment

Photo by ROMAN ODINTSOV on Pexels.com

As I was saying, time is our most precious commodity in life. I say “commodity” because I’ve noticed how easily people give up their time. Our time can be bought or given away for free. Don’t waste it on people who devalue their own time, because they will waste your time in the process! When I finally took a moment to breath and be in the moment, my life changed drastically! I not only valued my time, but I respected my own values by not allowing “time wasters” into my life. I spent some time alone with myself figuring out who I was and wo I wanted to be, then some more time figuring out what kind of guy I wanted in my life, and the kind of guy I didn’t want in my life. And when I figured out the kind of life I wanted to live and the kind of person I wanted to be, I realized quickly the kind of guy I actually wanted in my life. I realized very early in the game that the kind of guy I wanted in my life, really wouldn’t like the person I was prior to me working on me. So, I spent the next 5 years becoming the kind of person, “my ideal partner” would not only like but love! Once I did that, I realized I would rather be single then settled. And I no longer wanted to waste my time with men (or people) who would hold no value in the life I wanted to live. See, when you get alone with yourself to actually figure out what the hell you want, you stop wasting time on the people and things that make you miserable! Try to remember this one very important rule: “When you’re miserable so are the people you hang around” 

See, when we get a moment to gain clarity and perspective, our mind and motives, become abundantly clear. Suddenly we get this desire and passion for life, and in the process, we realize how precious our time truly is. Take it from me, when you’ve been single for a while, you never want to lose yourself to someone who doesn’t have the same vision, desire, or values for life, that you hold. Settling is not an option! This feeling is only something you can understand when you’ve spent enough time “alone and happy. That’s right, I said alone and happy! I can’t believe the amount of people in this world that struggle to be alone with themselves, but then they are confused why no one else wants to be alone with them. (smh) If you can’t be alone with you, don’t expect others to want to be alone with you!

Most single, independent women (and men) who have been single for any amount of time, have learned to embrace every season with purpose. One thing I’ve learned being single, is that I can go through struggles knowing I will regain new strength and meaning for each day! It is indescribable how resilient we become once we focus on the big picture. It is not something you can teach but must live to truly understand. Basically, if we can live life clinging to every season with grace and eagerness for more experiences and lessons, then we will live a life filled with experiences and lessons. Try to remember “We grow through what we go through”. We don’t want people in our life that add weight to our already heavy life. Rather, we want someone to come along for the ride with us who can handle the journey, building a life together! Most people who are 40 and up have already been with someone who drove them through hell and back at least once and they refuse to allow that happen again. I did say “most”. But some of you are a glutton for punishment because you never take the time to get over on before you get right on top of another!!! Yes, a little crude, but true. Com ‘on you know I am right! Quite frankly, many women over 40 are tired of cleaning up the damage you had with your ex. So, as the saying goes, “we would much rather be single than settled”.

Truth is that self-sufficient women don’t want someone who can’t handle the struggles of life. Life happens all the time and if a man can’t be strong and walk forward confidently in the struggles, why would she need him? She has been single this long and done just fine! Funny isn’t it, men say all they want is to feel needed, important, appreciated and loved, but most men don’t understand what those things mean to him. Let me also add Girls will not “Give sex for love” guys, that shit isn’t working anymore! We figured out; we love ourselves more and if we’re honest, they have toys that work magic for women today. Just saying!

Here is a prime example of what I am talking about…. I am scrolling through Facebook at 5am and this ad popped up. Obviously, another coaching ad! This female (we will call her Silly Sally) claimed to be offering help to all the “Independent single women who struggled to find a real man”. So, I decided to read into the comments, because there was no way I was clicking that link!

(Giggles) as I ask myself “who the hell told Facebook I was struggling to find a man? Why is this ad in my feed?” (scratching my head, rolling my eyes) “whatever….reading on…”

So, the creator continued to speak of how she was this “Single independent women” who moved and traveled for a year until she met this “great guy”! Then she proceeded to explain how she ended up with him and they moved in together after only 3 months! HELLO! WAIT! WHAT? WTF! Can someone say RED FLAG????!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE TODAY!! So quick to move in with each other! So, let me get this straight! This is a “Successful and Independent woman who is selling a program for women to “give up control” so she can be with a real man?” Umm…I’d love to be a fly on the wall at her house today! LOL Listen, real men don’t need you to give up control! Real men want powerful women and visa-versa! Powerful people need each other because they fuel one another. Bottom line! So don’t dumb down your character, tune in to your genius and recognize the red flags early on. Stop dating based on attraction, status, and sex!! There is no way sh learned enough about that guy in just 3 months. Shit like that drives me batty that women follow her and buy into her program because she is claiming to be a dating expert because she met some stranger at the peak of her career while traveling. And now they live together after three months so that makes her a expert? Are you freaking kidding me? That makes her an idiot!!!

Look, Men who find successful women intimidating are the ones will always fight and argue with her because they feel this need to “win”. Those are insecure, ego driven, ass holes with no real purpose in life. It’s very narcissistic. Let me fuel your soul with some wisdom right now…”If you are giving up control for any man, your weak and more codependent than independent! And you will never find your voice hiding behind anyone else’s ego”!

“Where are all the courageous men and all the strong women?”

So, if your single this holiday remember, independent women who want a partner, do NOT want to mother their partner! women, not all men are looking to take advantage of you for their own pleasure. Truth is, there are good and evil people in this world, and you must be one of the good ones to find the good ones, and then weed out the bad ones. I am a hopeless romantic, so I do believe in love. Especially during the holidays. I may not be the writer that believes in “love at first site” and Maybe I don’t agree with “moving in with someone too quickly”, But the magic I foresee goes beyond the basic romantic novels I read and write. I want happiness for myself, and I most certainly want happiness for my readers. But mostly, I want those individuals who feel lonely during the holiday season to find happiness inside themselves. I want more people to live in the moment, find contentment and happiness in their singleness, and discover a new life in the journey. Each person has a little crazy inside them. It’s okay to be strange and unusually. Embrace it, because that could be the very thing that attract your person. I admit it, I can be a little corky sometimes, my belief systems can seem a little “out of this world”, and my obsession with ORGANIC can be a little extreme. But I actually enjoy being single, so I embrace my weird, corky habits and hobbies. Maybe it’s the awkwardness of a first date or the “interview” like process that goes with the first date, that makes me avoid dating at all costs. (Giggles at self) Or it could just be that I want something that comes natural, easy, and leaves me craving more. After 7 years being single, I have never been on a date that has left me craving for a third date. I sadly admit they usually end by then! True story! Definitely a blog for another day.

Inquiring minds still want to know …… WHERE IS MY HOLIDATE?

I know! I Know! I am waiting patiently as well!! So, I guess until Mr. Holidate comes along, we will have to wait another year and see how or who the universe brings our way…

Fueling the fire inside WOMEN

CHRISTINA DITZEL Leave a comment

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“WOMEN BECOMING WARRIORS NOT WORRIES”

I woke up early this morning with this thought that women have this internal desire inside them for change! Many women who want to change personally, professionally, physically, and mentally, won’t like having people in their life that hold them back or take them off focus. Rather, they only want to surround themselves with people who will motivate their vision and help them move them forward. So if you are a women in the world who has a fire inside you to become the best version of yourself, but don’t know where to start, welcome! This is a place where you get the wisdom you need to fuel the fire inside you, so you can shine your light in the world. This morning I woke up with a desire to fight for all women! This is the start of a new era. A world where women are not worriers, but warriors of their communities.

THE FIRE THAT BURNS INSIDE US

The fire inside us women runs deep. It runs so deep that we can end up losing ourselves in the people and things around us if we are not wise. We live most of our youth doubting ourselves and never feeling whole or worthy. We have an eagerness for “more”. But in many cases we don’t know what that “more” is. Many women will reach the end of the road with the demons of all their regrets lingering around their death bed. And I do not want that for you!!!

Society does everything in its power to tell us how we should think, feel, and act. We are taught very young to “be good little girls”. They said things like “sit up”, “mind your manners”, “watch what you say” “watch who you say it to”. Some even went as far to tear us down and use abusive words like “You’re too fat! You’re too skinny” “You’re not smart enough” and “You’re not tall enough” “You’re not strong enough” “You can’t do that your a girl!” or even things like “You’re a girl, you are to be seen and not heard”. All these things people say to women only leaves us in doubt, fear, and living in regret.

In some countries today, women still have no rights at all and are used for the sole purpose of baring a son to carry on the legacy of their family name. Some women are even told what they can and can’t wear. Husbands share their wives with other men and are physically and sexually abused. In the Corporate America women still don’t get paid the same as the men and we are still seen as minority. Even if we have more credentials. Even if we do a better job and have degrees. For centuries women have been told to know our place and to mind our P’s and Q’s.

I could go on and on with the details of all the things women have had to endure over the years, from the different cultures that demean women, to the lack of respect we receive if we attempt to do the same things men do. BUT! I’m not writing this so we can throw a freaking pity party! I’m writing this so we can throw ourselves into warrior mode! So we can gain a little (or A LOT) of wisdom and make a difference in our communities and in the world we live in. No matter where you live!  And later, we will throw a GIRL POWER PARTY!

Look, I’m not saying all the “advice” people try to give out is bad advice. The start of wisdom is actually acceptance of the truths we ignore. Sometimes the truth hurts and we need to hear it so we can see some things about ourselves that we have otherwise ignored, or got comfortable with. In other words, we need to hold ourselves accountable. Seeing the truth is wisdom! By facing the ugly truths about ourselves, we can start taking some actions to fuel that fire that burns inside us. Truth is, when people say things it impacts our character, how we see ourselves, and how we live our life. Getting wisdom means we are aware of the things people are seeing and saying about us, but we don’t allow it to define us.

We’re not weak souls, we are strong, independent, powerful souls! We are born beautiful. We become mothers, sisters, daughters, and granddaughters. And playing those roles means we have the power and the responsibility to lead. We have abilities built in us to become bosses and owners of corporations. IT IS TIME TO FUEL THAT FIRE BABY!!! I mean, we have women running for presidency. The failure only comes when our leadership roles lack one important skill…WISDOM!

A WORD TO THE WISE

“Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding, for she is more profitable than silver and yields better returns than gold. She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor.”

Proverbs 3:13-16

Don’t take this word out of context! Hear what this message is actually saying. The “she” they are referring to here is Wisdom. It is saying Wisdom is much more precious than silver, rubies, and gold. Listen, I am with you ladies, I like my bling! I love the sparkle and shine! I like the way I feel when I wear it. I get it! But think about this, “what if you could have all the riches plus honor, and live a long life too? Wouldn’t you want to have this “Wisdom” they’re speak about? I know I do! I don’t just want a little of it either, I want a lot! “I want as much Wisdom a girl can get!”

HOW MUCH WISDOM CAN A GIRL GET?

Well, that depends on a few factors…

  1. How much do you want?
  2. Who is feeding you?
  3. Who’s feeding your mind and what are they feeding it?
  4. Who and what influences your soul?
  5. And, are you willing to do the work?

Our physical bodies hear the noise around us. We see the toxic and the blessings. We smell the stench of evil, and we feel the pain inflicted. How long will it take us to realize we are in control of our own destiny? We are warriors in a world full of people who are afraid of our ability to be brilliant and resilient. It’s easier to keep us down, rather than watch us flourish. They romance us with all the “50 Shades of Grey” mindset to keep us submitting to their ideas, and their beliefs. Living in a physical world where all we want is a voice, and a purpose, it is so difficult for us to wrap our minds around the idea that “we actually do have a choice”. We can choose to succumb to the fantasies that produce illusions, or we can surrender to all the experiences we desire that produce change in our life. All we have to do is take the first step. Owning our part and taking one small action that will move us forward. If you are asking yourself “But what is that action? and Where do I start?”

THIS IS THE START OF A NEW ERA. A SAFE PLACE WHERE WOMEN FIGHT FOR THESELVES AND THE WOMEN AROUND THEM.  WHERE WE GAIN WISDOM, VALUE INTEGRITY AND LIVE IN ABUNDANCE. TAKE A STAND WTH WOMEN FROM ACROSS THE WORLD AND JOIN TODAY AND FUEL THAT FIRE THAT BURNS INSIDE YOU!

SUBSCRIBE TODAY TO BE A PART OF SOMETHING BIGGER! FOR THE POWER TO EMBRACE THE WARRIOR IN YOU!  

“WHERE’S MY HOLLIDATE”? (Part 1)

CHRISTINA DITZEL Leave a comment

“They are either really buff and not that bright, or their really bright and have commitment issues”!

Let’s face it, the holidays get closer, and singleness sort of sucks! You want someone sitting by your side during holiday dinners or standing next to you at all those Christmas and New Year’s events. We each have an innate desire for a companion. Whether it be an intimate relationship or just a simple friendship. But no one truly enjoys being alone during the holidays.

Most single women want the kind of man who sees her for who she truly is. A sexy goddess who has internal and external desires, passions, and dreams. Someone who will build her up! Not that confident woman these days “Need” any man to confirm how amazing she truly is! Since she already puts herself on a 100ft pedestal!  But let’s be honest, deep down to the very core of our souls, women (and men) just want the kind of person that adds excitement and value to our life. You know that person that sees you from across the room and knows the perfect thing to say, just to save you from that family member with all the drama. Or the one that helps you avoid those awkward questions about how you are single for the umpteenth year!

But still, I find myself asking this question…”where are all the good men that are worthy enough to bring home for the holidays?” “Inquiring minds want to know”! Where is my “holidate”? Where are the men that have bodies and brains? Where are the men that don’t have commitment issues…? or “mommy issues” or any issues for that matter! Ugh. It feels like more and more men are embracing Christian Grey’s role of being “50 shades of fucked up!!”

Truth be told, it really is exhausting as a single, independent women who is looking for a date during the holidays. Or any days for that matter! When you’ve been single for any amount of time, you can expect questions about your singleness to head your way. As if those lonely holiday events weren’t dreadful enough…Here they come…. WAT FOR IT…

“Why are you still single?”

Are you dating anyone?”

Girl, when are you going to get out there and start dating again?”

 “Don’t you get lonely

“Don’t you get horny

Uh, like seriously! WTF

I can’t tell you how many single, independent women are sick of these questions! YES! We are obviously still single! And YES! We are always (secretly) looking around! And YES! We get lonely…sometimes! And YES! We go on more dates than we’d like to admit! But it is quite exhausting! And while everyone around you is expecting you to show up with a guy, just for the sake of not being the 3rd, 5th, or 9teenth wheel in the room, is even more daunting than going on all those time-wasting dates!Those of you who have been with someone for the last decade, let me just say that dating is not what it used to be. Work it out! Be happy with what you have and make the best of it. You picked him (or her) for some god-awful reason, and you really think you’re in a place to find something better? ha ha ha Think again my friend!!! Because people out here today…. umm not kidding…… I have one word for you…. CRAZY!

People in the dating scene today, are all kinds of mixed up! I don’t know if its the COVID JUICE, or what, but people have no clue what they want, and what they dont want. People in the dating scene are not themselves and don’t know how to act on a date! Dating is just exhausting! Honestly, after going on about 100+ dates, (could be exaggerating just a little…. maybe) I have acknowledged a consistency and pattern with the men I have gone out with lately. For instance, did you know most men actually have expectations for women to fulfill certain needs, wants, and desires? Oh YES! But the real kicker, is that they can’t even figure out what they actually want, need or desire. (Scratching my head and giggling) So basically the expectations they have for their dates, are irrelevant until they figure it out themselves! Insecure and naive women who date these men are bound to fail and will end up losing themselves to these narcissistic animals! If I may be blunt …(as if I  haven’t been already) I feel like most people today run-on greed. The thoughts, actions, and intentions some individuals have today are negative and selfish with underlining motives!  And trust me when I say, “they are never good”! This is because when men and women go on dates, they act so fake right out the gates! So many people today are insecure, and “codependent”! They don’t know how to be themselves around strangers without putting up a front. I just don’t understand it!

To define yourself through someone else’s eyes, only leads to confusion, and unhealthy relationships. What we want in life and what we want in a partner must be known. Furthermore, we must be a representation of what our expectations are. All single people should decide to spend enough time alone to get over their last relationship and also to discover who they truly are without anyone. Who are you before the person?  Are you true to yourself or do you see what is trending and follow all “the cool kids”? Funny how people say they know what they want, but they either follow the trend or expect their partner to “represent” for them. I just wish men would stop sexualizing women, and women would stop downplaying the role of our men! Seriously lady’s, are you wanting a husband or another child? Stop mothering and patronizing men! If Gen X is concerned about why their Generation Z children are in the LGBTQ+++ community, this is why! Uncertainty of thy self, due to pressure of fitting into someone (or everyone) else’s bubble! Or perhaps it’s just shitty parenting skills. Seriously, at this rate I’m going to die alone and single! And honestly, if these narcissistic, needy, “man children” are my only options? Well, at this rate, I’m better off!

I honestly don’t know where we lost respect and boundaries in our dating life, but somewhere along the way we’ve gotten lost. Dating used to be personal and private. It was exciting, flirty, honest, and mostly it was a process. Girls/Women respected themselves and men courted a woman. Adultery was not flaunted around, and most young children (10 and 11 years old) still played with dolls and toys. Not Sex TOYS and BOYS!! I honestly don’t think it is just America either. I do think we have completely downgraded our value and self-worth as men and as women across the globe. Therefore, we have downgraded our standards for our relationships. We don’t date with purpose anymore, we just date for the sake of not being alone and for pure intimate pleasure.

So, how do we find the perfect date for the holidays? Well, if dating in 2021 was like going to Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory and trying out every flavor but choosing the damn hard candy that only cost .02 cents! (WTF?). Let’s do better on our choices! Seriously? If you were going to choose the cheapest piece of candy, why did you even visit the factory? You could have just gone to the convenience store!! Stop wasting your time! Get clear on who you are, and who you want and don’t want in your life!

COME BACK FOR PART TWO….. FINDING MY HOLIDATE FOR 2022 –

WHO AND WHAT ARE YOU CREATING???

CHRISTINA DITZEL Leave a comment

If you are a single mom you might understand what I’m about to say. But I hope every parent gets this….

What kind of adults are you creating? Even though my girls are older, there are so many moments when I sit back and just observe them from a distance. I hear them laughing in the next room together or see them dancing around the house, or just cuddling in bed together. I see how kind and humble they are to their friends. Even those who hurt them. But still, they stand strong and support one another! I can not explain the joy that rushes through me to know they love one another so much and always have each other’s back.

I must say, it was not easy to get these girls to respect each other. I had to give lots of tough love! And I still do! Even though it hurts me to do it. I’d do it all over again just to witness the love they share, just once. If I’m honest, I went through so much shit with their dad, that I missed out on a lot of years. I was NOT PRESENT.! I mean, not really.

PARENTS: If you are busy “getting busy” Its time to reevaluate how you use your time. You don’t get a do-over on bonding with your children. You can’t go back and make them small children, once their adults.

I get it! It’s hard to work a full-time job and raise kids on your own with little to no help. But let’s be honest, that’s just an excuse! People make time for other people and things when it benefits them! Or it’s convenient for them. It takes a very big person, and an even bigger soul to admit when we are falling short.

When I was with their father, I could have done better! I admit that! I could have done A lot better! I was not the best parent back then, but I make it my duty to be the greatest parent today! “The truth is we are all created. So, tell me, who and what are you creating???”