How to Gain Clarity in your Losses


Leveling up your playing field

Photo by Jill Wellington on Pexels.com

First, let me start by say that leveling up your playing field means “You get to live the life you want without other people controlling any part of your belief system, your decisions, or your lifestyle. That means, we need to gain total control of our mind, our actions, our health and our finances so we can live our life with a clear vision of the life we want. Being an entrepreneur and business owner, I thought I had all that covered. Boy was I wrong!!! Let me first share with you a little back story of how I lost total control of my business, my finances and most importantly, myself worth, and then I will share how I gained clarity in all my losses

So, what brought me to this place where I feel lack and frustration was when I had a client who caught covid and did not give me the common courtesy to give me a choice!! Now don’t hear what I am not saying. I am not blaming this customer for my being here today, because we all know when we point one finger at someone else, we have three fingers pointed back at ourselves. So first we must always acknowledge that by allowing others to have control, we are enabling them. I wanted to be clear on that. So, moving on…

This particular client confirmed their appointment with me and had me arrive at their home on our usually 9:30-10am bi-weekly appointment. They confirmed and I showed up! I allowed them to have control of the situation because I depend on that income. I “needed” them. I could have just as easily walked out the door and told her to call me when she is feeling better. Let me state clearly, that when people know you “need them”, you put yourself in a very vulnerable place. Okay so continuing….

By deciding to stay and provide services for this client, it just so happens, that it caused me to further lose other work in the process. How you ask? Well, for one, I had to cancel other work as to avoid getting other clients sick. And then second, me and my daughters did end up getting sick. So that was two weeks of work gone!
Okay, so its flu season, right? So, what, I got a sore throat and had to take the day or a few days off. No big deal, right? I know your already probably thinking, “What is the point of this story? And what does it have to do with finding clarity?” But just stay with me for a moment! I get it your thinking “It’s not really a big deal” Where I reply, “Until it is a bigger deal then I thought all along!” Let me first just say that no matter what you’re going through right now, your feelings and your emotions play a huge role in your actions. And the trauma you experience will continue to add roadblocks in your actions and in your journey through life.

“Our circumstances equal our playing field, and our playing field equals our opportunity to Level up our life”!


If life has taught me anything it’s that I am not in control of other people, their thoughts or their actions. Therefore, I have no control of my (past, current or present) situation if I give control away. Funny thing is, for the last few years, I thought I was living by this quote “You can’t control other people, but you can control how you react towards other people.”

I literally teach this concept in my book, podcasts and through blogs, and here I am, stuck laying in my bed, feeling completely contradicting of everything I represent! Truth is, to me “not reacting to other people means, “Don’t’ overreact when people treat you like shit!” or “Don’t allow others to upset you when they are assholes.” And as I still believe this concept to be true, there is still an underlying issue that I didn’t even realize until I took action and signed up for Lisa Bilyeu RADCON course. She really helped me see what radical confidence really means! She lead me in a whole new direction. She took me from being unclear about my goals and my purpose in life to finding my purpose in life. She took me from being scared, doubtful, embraced, and even self shaming, to being able to take massive actions, and be “The hero of my own life”. See without the right people directing you and feeding into your soul, you can’t lose the blocks that keep you from reaching your full protentional.

By allowing my client to have control is just one example of me not having control in my life. At this point now, I am still searching right? So, digging into Lisa’s course, I then get a call from Natasha Graziano’s assistant. I’m going to be honest here and go out on a limb, I had no clue who Natasha was. I looked her up and saw she was super famous, successful and looked extremely happy and abundant! I went on a research binge to find out all that I could on this Natasha Graziano. And realized I actually just saw her a few weeks prior on an episode at Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. I was in my awe moment because I just realized all the synchronicities that were appearing in my life. I just began to feel blessed. Even more then I already felt, if that was possible!

I spoke to an amazing women Named Maria from Natasha Graziano’s team and she convinced me to sign up for their Authority Accelerator course. If I’m going to be completely honest with myself, and with you, I was feeling a little overwhelmed and was tired of people trying to sell me on courses. However, I remembered all the things I heard in Lisa Bilyeu’s course, and I knew I had to lose the doubt and fear that was creeping in. Lisa calls this “The bitch in my head”. I literally had to tell her to “shut the hell up because I was, I was in control of my actions. I am now a ‘WOMEN OF IMPACT’ and I was taking control of my own destiny”!

I was allowing the excuses to overwhelm me. The excuse that “I still haven’t completely finished my RADCON course that I just paid for” and “I just needed a job”, thoughts like; “I am not in season, and I have limited funds coming in now” kept freaking me out and causing my stress levels to raise. They kept coming at me “not to mention, I just got a new car and have a higher car payment” the bitch in my head would not stop there…. “How are you going to pay for the roof over daughters heads?”

Then I paused for a moment when I realized my “Zen” was gone! SRA SRA SRA Telling myself (Chistina, Stop in your tracks, Realign your thoughts, and Assess your focus) In that very moment I made a decision. See, when I told a new friend about the situation with my client who totally disrespected me, he just reminded me that, I allowed another person to control me by not removing myself completely from the situation! They controlled my health, my business, my schedule, and my finances. And all because I allowed them to do so! See, I thought by ignoring the situation, that meant I was being the bigger person. But I was in fact, enabling people to continue to devalue me, shoot me and my character down, and preventing myself from making radical moves into my purpose driven life. I had no clarity because the Lenz I was looking through, was not my own.

Gain Clarity in Your Losses!

Like many people who have lost their businesses from this pandemic, it’s become exhausting to even hear the word “COVID”! It’s going on three years at this time, and I’m just drained! This pandemic is sucking the life out of us! The politics and inflation are killing us! And the struggle and stress are physically killing us every single day! So, what now? 2022 is here and halfway throght the year already! It’s time to move on! It is time to see life through a new Lenz! A ZEN LENZ! It is time find clarity so you can life blessed in your mess, love the journey, and feel abundant in all areas of life! but how? How do we get clarity of the mind and becone grounded and understand how we find our true purpose? Well, I will tell you. “By taking RADICAL ACTIONS THAT OFFER RADICAL RESULTS!”

See, the day maria contacted me to join the authority accelerator course, I am not going to lie. everything in my being said “Say thank you for the opportunity and hang the dam phone up!!” But that day I did something different! I told myself “Com ‘on Christina make a new choice!!! Stop talking about it an be about” I told myself all the things I’ve been saying in these blogs, and in my book. And I didn’t know what was about to happen, but I did know one thing was for sure, I knew I did not want to be a hypocrite or live life contrary to my beliefs. Let me just say CLARITY IS POWER! And this just became my new motivator to pursue multiple sources of income that no government, no pandemic, and not one single person can control. And do you know why? Because its only in my mind, its in my thoughts, its in my words and its in my actions. And no one in this world, not even the negative bitch in my head, can play the role of Ms. Christina Ditzel.

See as I was saying in the beginning of this article, sometimes, we must level up our playing field, so we can have clarity to know how to gain total control of our life! If we are not learning, planning, strategizing, and consistently making choices that benefit our own life, we are not living our life at all! Take Control of your life so others can’t control you!!

I am always learning new ways to overcome adversity and get clarity. But it wasn’t until I took drastic steps to do things that scared me, and helped me, to find my way out of all the fog. My hope is that by sharing my experiences, you can avoid making some (or all) of the mistakes I made along the way. Don’t waste any more time doing the things that hold no value in your life and add no meaning to your future. So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where someone else is controlling any part of your life, look inward first. You have to reflect that negative situation back onto yourself first. Unfortunately, this is the only way to begin to find the clarity needed to rise above it. Ugh, realizing this was so empowering and gave me such an “aah’ ha’! ” Moment of relief, that I became excited for life in a childlike way.

Embrace the unknown with Confidence

Yes, I was uncomfortable to step out into the unknown, but I am beaming with excitement for the unexpected things that are going to happen! Look, we always have a choice. It may not be the easiest or maybe it’s not the most practical alternative, but we always have an opportunity to choose other options that benefit us! Which is why you need to “embrace the unknown with confidence”! Now this does not mean, we should continue to make bad choices and it doesn’t mean we should stop making choices at all! Not making any choices good or bad just keeps up in limbo. It keeps us stuck and prevents us from moving forward. Wasting time, we can never get back! I’m taking about acknowledging that you struggle to make decisions that will benefit you, more than they benefit others. I have done this for years in my businesses, in my family, in my relationships, and I find that it becomes a habit! But the thing about a habit, is that it can be learned, and it can be unlearned just as well!

Embracing the unknown with confidence, means, you get to enter new experiences that you know to need and want for yourself. It means you are making a decision to do something for yourself, that will benefit you now, which will benefit others later. I talk a little deeper on this in my article “Life’s Ripple effect Revealed”. Or you can check out my article on “Why do I stay” to find out more about my story, the abuse I have overcome and how i got to this abundant place in my life that offeres so opportuny and experiences.

I just want to leave you with one last thought. What if you decided today to Stop allowing others to control you? What if you had enough confidence to make some really difficult choices that would benefit your life tomorrow? What if you knew what actions you could take to get you one step closer to the life you truly desire? If you knew you could take just one small action toward your desires and see an immediate result, would you follow up that decision with Radical Confidence? Because I know the fear of stepping out into the unknown! I did it! And here I am still doing it with full confidence! I am on this amazing journey full of opportunities. If you need proof, I got you! I decided to document my journey through and to success and purpose. To get tips, resources, and information on cleansing, clarity, security and abundance reach out to your EPIC MUSE here.


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